I've shared through The Puzzle Club on Facebook that, since Matthew is now 18, we are in the guardianship process. It's definitely uncharted waters and I am treading water every step of the way. There is more involved than I realized; getting him set up with his own bank or credit union account, meeting with a court appointed attorney prior to the hearing, and, of course, the hearing itself which is coming up in less than two weeks. I'm pretty sure I am not the only autism parent to be going through this process and I think it's safe to say that, while it is a necessary thing, it's also a difficult thing. Who ever imagines having to become a guardian to your own child? I know I didn't!
Along with that, I also never imagined I'd be getting looks of pity while setting his account up at the local credit union. Please don't misunderstand me; this teller was a sweetheart, kind hearted, friendly, all of that. She also had "that look". If you are an autism parent you have seen "that look." It is a look that says, "You poor, poor thing! Whatever are you going to do?" or "___________________________________________" (you supply the phrase. I've no doubt she meant well. However, I've been "pitied" so much over the years that I am almost numb to it.
If "that look" weren't enough, I then took Matthew to Wal-Mart so he could cash in his empty pop bottles. As we walked in, I saw one of my cousins in the entry way waiting to be picked up. She's an older cousin, a month younger than my mom. We got to chatting and I was telling her what all was going on and going through the guardianship process. Her question? "Is there a home he can go to?"
Okay...did I just hear what I thought I heard?
Give me a minute....
I did? I did hear that?
Are you freaking kidding me? Is there a home he can go?!? For real?!?
I must have shot her a look of some kind because her expression seemed to change almost instantly.
I mumbled a generic answer. I have no clue what . As usual, it came to me later what I would have liked to have said. Just a simple sentence, nothing fancy, nothing elaborate.
Yes, there is a home he can go to....OUR HOME!!!!!
